i rarely take naps these days, but today i decided i couldn't last until the evening. i faded off and almost instantly began to dream. i don't remember dreams so vivid in quite a while... the unrelenting pang in my heart, the unsteady breathing and mumbles. it goes without saying that it was far from a dream. and what's worse, i couldn't tell whether or not it was real. i continuously woke from my "dream state" only to find i was still asleep. it turned out to be more exhausting than if i had just continued with my day.
it was about him, my superman. he was alive, but only after i had grown used to his death. so when he came back it was strange. my mother's number had replaced his, our house was without room for him, overall i was lost. i had been lost without him and now lost with him. it was a terror i can't explain, sending jolts of pain into my body. and right before the close of the dream, he was gone again. i didn't think that anything could hurt more than losing him, i was wrong..
the second time was harder.
you're a poet :)
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