it been 9 years since i've last seen you. since i really truly looked at you; studied every portion of your face from the flecks in your eyes to the scruff you left on your face in the morning.
you visited me in my sleep last night and i said "you look exactly the same" as i awkwardly hugged the person that broke my heart in half. the rest of my past merely infected the wound, but you, oh you just opened it up to the entire world. i turned beat red from the expression on your face; as you tried to figure out how you could have ended up in the vicinity of my voice, my eyes. how after all these years, my mind would still let you escape that dark place i locked you away in. (you have the drugs for this retched illness to blame that on.)
after all this time i don't blame you, i know that his death scared you. you thought that i would just come undone and maybe at one point i had.
but i would appreciate it if you didn't come back here.
my dreams have no place for you anymore, conscious or not.
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