Wake Up. Look Me in the Eyes Again.

i know it's not my job to fix you. and it's not like i believe you're broken. i don't. but you look like you are. it's as if your soul is shattering slowly behind your eyes, and i can see it. i can hear it in your voice as it wavers on the other line. and i just want to pick up the pieces and put you back together again. i want to hold you in a way that proves i'm staying right here. i want to convince you that i won't run, because during my weakest moments you swore you'd chase me.
but i can't fix what's not broken.
and i don't want to change you.


i love you for exactly who you are. body and soul. words and thoughts. good and bad.

No, I'm Never Gonna Leave You Darling.

i didn't know people said things like that or could look at another person that way. i didn't know that men romanced women anymore. or that i would stumble across one that wanted to do that to me. i wasn't expecting what i have found.
they're right you know, those people of the past who spoke so highly of love at first sight. the ones who swore that people would just know. they do. when your other half is standing in front of you, you're fully aware of it. it's startling, terrifying actually, but once you accept it it's beautiful.

Yeah, I Bet You're Bending God's Ear Talking 'bout Me.

he had words to say about everything. words to make me ache, but in a good way. words that could make me smile for days. he had jokes. jokes that i would remember throughout the day and laugh about randomly.
how does a person do that to another person? how does someone walk into your life casually and suddenly change it forever? am i ready for such a change? is he?

i'm happy, but this is all too fast. fast scares me because it's usually only a matter of time before it crashes and burns. all my defenses are quickly being broken and i'm not sure if it's fate or death that's knocking at my door.
i'm preparing to give you something that's very sacred to me, please don't damage it.